At CPM we are loving social distancing! Maybe we’re a little crazy, but hear us out:
Social distancing is our favorite. We would like people to stand 6 feet away in perpetuity. We do not mind waiting outside Costco for a few minutes, because once you get inside, it’s not overly crowded. There is no long checkout line. No one asks you if you want a credit card, solar panels or DirecTV. People don’t bring their entire family. There is no social hour by the books. There aren’t hordes of people blocking aisles waiting for a tiny piece of frozen pizza (there is also no wanton waste associated with handing out millions of samples every day).
Ever stood in a line when a person behind you is clearly sick but stands 12 inches away? Or someone came to work sick and coughed all over your workstation, and then you got sick, and then your kids got sick? Perhaps your kid got sick from being crammed into a classroom with 30 other kids, then you got sick? No one should get sick because others don’t stay home (or far away) when they’re sick. Now those people must stand 6 feet away. There is no longer a need to give the snotty guy in line behind you the death stare because he stood too close. He is already a comfortable 6 feet away.
Restaurants pack in tables like sardines in a can. So yes, you can see the cute little toddler pop her head up behind you and wave and smile at her, but you can also hear her parents order, eat, argue, and talk on the phone. Then the cute little toddler sneezes over the booth. We don’t want to hear her parents phone calls. We also don’t want to be sneezed on by toddler cuteness.
Social distancing should be a new norm. Stores should continue to limit the number of people allowed inside.
And airlines. Airlines are the worst. We don’t even need to say much more than:
Do you check your arms and legs at baggage claim or does that cost extra?
Please stop packing us into every venue like sardines in a can! We need space!